Sunday, July 15, 2007

The Four Letter Word.

I've signed up for a GMAT prep class and I have to take their Math classes, every Sunday morning. For three hours. I went to my second class today and the instructor was a lot faster than I'd have liked. Then again, if I began to ask him doubts the class wouldn't go anywhere and that's unfair to the rest of the bunch. All of this is mundane but it serves as background for what's to follow.

When I tell the world I was born with no grasp of mathematics, I can't count, I can't make sense of little triangles sharing planes with other shapes, please believe me. We were discussing Mensuration and Coordinate Geometry this week. Though certain concepts of Mensuration did seem like French, Coordinate Geometry was well and truly beyond me. Given that I was functioning on little sleep, here are my 'staying awake and alive' tips for the day:

1. If everything seems to be a blur and sleep's calling, try giving each eye a rest. I shut one for 20 seconds and then the other. At some point in time, the guy teaching must have thought I was hitting on him.

2. Fiddle with the mobile phone. Pretend to read messages. There are very few people on my list who are awake at that hour who will find humour in this given situation.

3. Write the lyrics to all the songs you're singing in your head in the 'rough' space. There was 'Hands Clean', 'Losing my Religion', 'Change the World' and a few more.

4. Practice weird signatures.

5. Doodle. Draw. Sketch.

6. When the class ends, say Thank You the loudest.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

The weekend that was.

The weekend off at Bangalore has helped me unwind, considerably. That’s good news for everybody who’s had to put up with the crib machine! :)

For the first time in a long time, I managed to stay awake for most parts of my train journeys. Indication enough that the biological clock is tick-tocking in the right direction. The Chennai to B’lore route had me sitting next to a family of four who were visiting India from America. The dad was extremely friendly as he patiently entertained the kids whose curiosity was a little hard to contain. Mixed accents, Spelling Bee version Lal Bagh 1.0, numerous trips to the loo – one kid at a time… I wonder if I will be the mum ten years hence. For a person like me, it seems a really scary thought but I’m learning to leave the doubts behind and view things positively.

Also, I saw several abandoned station buildings along the way and I wonder what ghosts inhabit them. There’s a charm about old abandoned buildings that sends a tingle down my spine. I took a trip down nostalgia lane to a time when my friends and I made up stories about the old building we lived next to. There was the ghost of the old lady (poor woman, our imaginations killed her long before her time), the mysterious helicopter used by the hooded stranger and the several surreptitious activities we thought the house might be used for.

B’lore brought me back to the present. This trip was a first of sorts. I didn’t find the city unpleasantly cold. It was cool and breezy, though; by the end of it all I was / am saddled with a sore throat. There’s always something wonderful about reconnecting with good friends. Over yummy lunches, dinners, interesting shopping experiences, fantastic tennis matches and stay overs, I had one of the better weekends in a while.

Laallalalala. I’m living down the last few days of being 22. Till the 23rd. :)

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

The countdown to nowhere.

I’m feeling a sense of despair that I’ve never felt before. Each morning, I wake up feeling empty and I just can’t place why. I don’t know when I ever placed my life in the hands of many others quite like this, but, it is proving to be extremely difficult to win it back.

This new move isn’t helping as much though I do realize I’m being a brat at times. I’m enjoying a lot of luxury at home that I will miss dearly if I move out again. Then again, I miss the independence so much that I’m starting to wonder if I’m just one of those people who’s meant to be at their best when left alone? Or are independence and loneliness two entirely different entities?

Fewer things keep me sane through the day and I’m counting each one down. Only I don’t know when this countdown will ever end. I’m the only one who can stop it and I just don’t know how.